My copy of this movie has no subtitles and is completely in Turkish, but from the plot I could take is that it’s a Turkish version of Casper, the friendly ghost who falls in love with a young living woman living in his house. After that, it doesn’t make much sense, as the story goes into different places and shows many hallucinatory and even nightmarish images, something the Christina Ricci version never tried. I don’t do drugs, but this is the kind of movie I’d recommend watching while being on the influence of something. I mean, look at these pictures.
Watch it. High.
If you think this sounds completely insane, that’s because it is. Still, I have to give credit to documentarian Sean Donnelly, who is able to find a lot of humanity and sympathy for the two subjects instead of just finding them as two crazy people. Still, there are some intense moments of insanity. In the most disturbing scene, Kelly, with tears in her eyes and anger in her voice, claims that she has the birth-right to be married to Tiffany and that she is married to an impostor that has stolen Kelly’s identity and fate. Other moments involve Jeff Turner, who creates these weird fantasies about Tiffany being his best friend, but not being able to communicate it with him for reasons of appearance, and that they talk on the phone and are in love with each other in secret. These are two very sad, very lonely people, but we’re able to relate to them instead of just making fun of them.
The scenes where the characters meet and talk with Tiffany are very awkward, particularly the one where Jeff is looking at Tiffany’s Playboy pictures in the middle of the convention floor. The documentary sadly ends on something of a half note. On the one-hand, Kelly is able to get her life back together, even if she still has hope that she will someday marry Tiffany. Jeff, on the other hand, completely abandons his Tiffany fantasies and decides to focus instead on Alyssa Milano, one of my top 10 babes. Jeff begins to talk about how Milano is another time-traveller who has intervened in between his and Tiffany’s relationship so that him and Milano can be together. You feel as if you want to laugh, if it wasn’t so damn creepy at the same time. This is a very interesting documentary on how two people’s loneliness and mental imbalance can create a parallel planet. It’s very good and very interesting.
The film’s main flaw are it’s budget limitations. It was probably shot on a Bolex 16mm, and that camera’s inability to record sync sound is apparent, as characters talk without their words matching their lips. That’s about it, however. The movie is able to mix elements from past films like Cat People and Carnival Of Souls to re-package them into an original, fresh take on a zombie genre. I’m surprised nobody else has thought about making a film similar to this, as it’s more than easy to adapt into a modern setting. The backwoods setting is excellent, with the mud, trees and mood almost breaking through my television set. And somebody sure as hell wasted their budget on the fog machines, they’re on full time and it looks awesome, like an American Transylvania. Acting-wise, the film is mostly good, with Laurel Barnett being able to show a lot of emotion while looking hot at the same time. Rosalie Cole stands out, however, as the psychic-powered hellion from hell. It’s a tragedy that this is the only film she was ever in (as far as imdb is concerned) because she had a lot of talent and could have gone pretty far.
One thing that has to be taken into account is the look of the zombies. They don’t look like your traditional undead; hell, they look more reptilian in nature, but still human enough to look like rotting undead. They eat cats and human flesh, and the makeup effects are pretty damn gory, causing a lot of face and eye damage on most of the cast. The blood is that orangy-red fake blood that is more notorious for being used in Dawn of the Dead, which adds to the air of spooky, lack of realism that this movie gloriously displays. I wish more horror movies had the balls to mix fantasy with horror. This is a great movie and comes highly recommended.
This was the beginning of the end for Hammer. Not only was it the last of their Frankenstein films, but also the last to be directed by the master, Terence Fisher, who died soon after finishing the film. Still, he was able to go with a bang, as the film looks as good as any of the early classic Hammer films. Setting it in an insane asylum was a wise choice, as it gives us plenty of gothic imagery without being force-fed upon us. Even in the most contrived of scenes, such as the burial of the artist where Victor suddenly pops out of nowhere and slowly closes the casket lid, are handled very well. Acting wise, it’s pretty damn good. Peter Cushing is the main attraction, of course, bringing the class and talent to a role he was already very familiar with. Here, he is not as sadistic or evil as he was in Frankenstein Must Be Destroyed, but he’s not exactly a good guy either. He ‘causes’ the deaths of the inmates he needs body parts from, and seems to be more concerned with letting the Monster practice complex mathematics than giving it food. Speaking of the monster, it was played by David Prowse, the same man who would soon be playing Darth Vader in the first three Star Wars films. He is able to inject a lot of personality and sympathy to the creature, no small feat considering the costume is one of the worst in the history of Hammer, even worse than the bat creature used in Scars Of Dracula. On the other hand, Shane Briant is as dull as many English actors of the time (think David Hemmings), and Madeline Smith seems to be there just to be quiet and look hot. At least in The Vampire Lovers she had some good dialogue, even if her pale nude body was on display!
I don’t know if it was a big hit or not, but it couldn’t have been considering that Hammer would release only a few movies after this, like Captain Kronos, Twins of Evil and To The Devil A Daughter. These are all good movies, don’t get me wrong, but I can understand that the air was dead for the company, considering the more realistic and visceral territories that horror was now heading into. Still, the movies are classics and I watch them every year two or three times each. Don’t be fooled by the fact that this is the last in a long running series, since it ended with a lot of class.
Both movies share similar stories. Christopher Syn is a respected vicar by day, a man respected all over England. By night, he is the Scarecrow of Romney Marsh, a pirate on the run who smuggles food and alcohol in the beaches of the Romney Marsh. He is a Robin Hood figure, a character who steals from the rich and gives to the poor. As you can imagine, the English government hates him and is trying to stop him, even if they don’t know who the scarecrow is. This is where the similarities with the Hammer version end, as this is definitely more adventure-themed than suspense-themed, and the look of the characters is nowhere near as frightening as they were in Captain Clegg. Then again, they’re not supposed to be. The story is separated in three episodes, all almost having the same plot, only with different situations and side characters, from informers to assholes who beat up men and take them by force to join the Navy. The second episode, being the informer one, is my favorite, particularly because of the kangaroo court scene in the end which reminded me a lot of the one featured in M.
The show is littered with truly excellent performances. Patrick McGoohan (from the TV series, The Prisoner) played the title role, and he’s excellent in the role. Good looking and charming, but when he’s the Scarecrow his accent and mannerisms completely change, almost like they were two different actors. And his laugh is incredible! His nemesis, Coronel Peuh, is played by Geoffrey Keen, more famous for playing Frederick Gray in the James Bond films, and the conservative father in Taste The Blood Of Dracula (“You drink the filth!”) and he’s as annoying and obnoxious as ever. The production design is flawless, and it looks like Disney really put their money up there. It’s one of the better TV series to be produced by the studio, with action, adventure, and very well-written scripts. They’re available in the Disney Club online store, so check it out!
The biggest flaw this movie has is in that it doesn’t follow one straight storyline with consistency. Subplots show up of all kinds, from a reporter to a doctor who finds out too much, something about a new soil that will help/enslave third world countries, it’s too much for one story. The original had one basic premise and storyline, and it made me sad that this film couldn’t do the same, because all it did was make me lose interest. The movie has good acting, don’t get me wrong, particularly from the great William Holden, who has been in so many great movies it could be a joke. Sunset Boulevard, Stalag 17, The Wild Bunch, Network, you know it. But here, it seems like he was just wasted, and most of the time he looked more confused than scared. I really missed Gregory Peck, who’s commanding performance in the original is one of the main things that made it more memorable. I was also a little sad that the evil demonic dogs were missing and instead were replaced with crows. Crows are not scary, folks, and even Hitchcock made it difficult for me to believe they were scary. I also have a lot of problems believing one crow could peck out an adult woman’s face off without the woman being able to fight back. Demonic crows or not, it was too far fetched for me.
There was one thing that I liked: I was very interested in Damien’s rise to evil and discovery of his powers. It was the most engaging part of the whole movie, and I wished it had been the central focus. Instead it just becomes another in many subplots. The death scenes, one of the main draws to watching the Omen series, were half and half: some were pretty hilarious (the woman who gets herself pecked to death then turns into a bad mannequin when a truck hits her), some were good (the guy who falls on the ice). The best death, however, belongs to Meshach Taylor, who plays a doctor who discovers Damien was born of a jackal. A level of absurdity kicked in when I realized the doctor was being played by the same guy who played the flamboyant Hollywood Montrose in the two Mannequin movies, but that only added to the joy of seeing him cut in half by an elevator’s metal cable. It’s so over-the-top that an Academy Award should be given to it for Most Outstanding Death sequence. Sadly this movie fails on most levels, and I wasn’t able to relate, nor care for anything or anyone. All it did was make me wish I was watching the first one.
This is an interesting production from Spain, directed by Jose Maria Forque who made many productions, mainly in Italy and Spain. Most are dramatic works, but this is definitely a sore thumb in his hands, as it reaches a level of perversity that is neither too offensive nor is it completely conservative, either. Hemmings is as dull as ever, and like Megan Fox, only has one facial expression during the whole movie. He was never a good dramatic actor, as I said earlier, but I wished he had made more comedy, which he was very good at (his cameo in Barbarella, for example). Andrea Rau is much more interesting, being both fragile and sexual, and very easy on the eyes. She’s also nude a lot of the time, and that helps. Almost as naked as she was in Daughters of Darkness, only here she is a little more tougher than she was in Daughters. We also have small but memorable roles by Alida Valli (Suspiria, The Third Man) as Hemmings mother, and classic Spanish character actor Francisco Rabal (Nightmare City, Dagon) as Tio.
The movie, sadly, doesn’t go far enough in its attempts at perversion, and the plot drags at a snail’s pace. After a while I just didn’t care about the movie, but kept interest solely because of Andrea Rau’s compelling performance and sexiness. We get some hilarious moments of perversion, such as Hemmings chasing after a victim dressed in a bunny suit, or when Hemmings fondles Rau’s naked body with a machete blade. But sadly these are small moments in an otherwise dull, long, and uninteresting film. 
This, of course, is owed to John Carpenter and Debra Hill. Knowing they had a limited budget, they decided to base their technique from their biggest influences, directors like Mario Bava, Dario Argento and Howard Hawks, and decided that by the use of camera angles and lighting could create something more frightening than any gore show could. Carpenter was a true filmmaker, one of the few working in low-budget horror, and his talent shines through here, as every angle, every dolly, has a meaning, and is there to frighten. You could blame the fact that in the sequels the quality went down because of the over-necessity on typical slasher conventions, but to me the ruin came in the use of directors that were no match compared to Carpenter. If you want proof, just look at the opening sequence in which young Michael Myers kills his sister. It’s composed of three long, extended shots, all which lead us from a peeping tom, to a horrific murder of a young woman, to the final horrifying reveal that it was a child doing everything. Talent like this is rarely seen in low-budget horror films, or higher ones for that matter.
The movie itself has a very good cast. The stand-out is obviously Jamie Lee Curtis, who is able to be plain and vulnerable but at the same time realistically beautiful and resourceful. It was a breakthrough role that, for a few years, crowned her as the queen of scream, until she decided to go Hollywood. Donald Pleasance also shows up as Loomis, in what would be Myers’ constant nemesis. Sometimes his performance can seem campy, but then again, very frightening, almost as frightening as the killer. When he talks about the horror he sees behind Myers’ eyes, you believe every word of his without really flinching. The rest of the cast is still pretty capable, particularly Nancy Kyes as Annie Brackett and PJ Soles as cheerleader Lynda, who may be your typical disposable teenagers, but are still fun to watch and, in the case of PJ and her perfect pj’s, is quite a treat to watch.
Michael Myers is a character onto himself, although we know of him the least. He walks in the shadows but strikes like a force of nature, creating the prototype of the archetypical slasher monster, even if that is simply a modified William Shatner mask. Even with all the great murders, however, the scariest sequence in the whole film, and probably the history of horror, begins with Laurie finding her friends dead, all through the unmasking of Myers. It’s the textbook example of how to create suspense in horror, with it’s low lighting, surprise attacks, and violent outbursts of violence created by Myers. You know Laurie doesn’t have a chance, and you just hope that she’ll be able to maintain a step ahead of the monstrous killer.
You can’t do a Halloween review without mentioning the score. Inspired by Goblin’s work on Deep Red, it is probably the most important element in the entire film, and probably what made the film such a huge success. It’s iconic, and as the film, it strikes and it’s fierce. Michael Myers would go on to become your typical immortal monster, turned into a family killer, the product of a Druid cult (hahah!), and remade as a professional wrestler. A lot of the terrifying essence, the evil inside of a human being placed on display, might have been lost on the series, but to this original film, he will always be the most terrifying boogieman in filmdom. There is always a debate within me about which is the greatest horror film of all time, between this one and the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and while both are very different, both are essential. And while TCM might be more raw, like a punch to the face, Halloween is like being strangled by horror, it’s slow but terrifying, and it’s impact on horror, film, and my life, can never be underestimated. 
When it comes to erotic thrillers, this one is definitely on top of the list, as far as quantity over quality is concerned. There is so much sex in this movie that is hard to watch it without a raging boner, especially considering how beautiful our leads are. It’s kinky as hell too, our actors were very brave, from showing us full close-ups of vaginas, to American actor Robert Egon getting a finger, and a comb, up his ass. Sadly their sexual bravery doesn’t translate to acting talent, and they are all pretty dull without an exception. Robert Egon in particular looks like a Barbie version of Ron Perlman from Beauty & The Beast, although to his defense, he has a cool name. Florence Guerin is extremely beautiful and is one of the bravest actresses in the world, but she can’t act either.
So to keep this one short and sweet, I’ll just say that this film could have been better if it was a full-on porno. It has a lot of explicit, and mostly kinky sex scenes that border on the hardcore but doesn’t go all the way. They tried to make a good erotic thriller, but they forgot that for a thriller to work, erotic or not, it has to have suspense. This movie is pretty rare, I myself could only find it with Chinese subtitles, but trust me, it’s not worth the hunt. 
Meanwhile, Tom reaches his wife in Palm Beach and finds out that she’s been hanging about with a millionaire. While Geraldine tries to explain that they are doing it to get money for Tom’s airport invention, Hackensacker’s sister, the Princess Centimilla (Mary Astor from The Maltese Falcon) joins in on the fun, and thinks Tom is the perfect man to join the ranks of the many husbands she’s been collecting. As you can tell it’s incredibly wacky, but that’s the point. Sturges’ usual flawless screenwriting shines in this film, giving us a group of over-the-top characters and situations. The movie is filled with hilarious sequences, such as the opening scene with Colbert talking to a deaf old man who, after a series of misunderstandings, lends her seven hundred dollars. There’s also the scenes on the train where we get a bunch of drunken hunters going after Geraldine, thinking she’s been kidnapped, with the dogs and everything. It’s the kind of exaggerated, anarchistic comedy setups that Sturges is known for, and it’s awesome too.
The acting is pretty much excellent from everyone involved. Claudette Colbert shines as always in a role that she was basically born to play, while Joel McCrea is perfectly dull for his role, which works since he isn’t supposed to be a very exciting guy. I’m surprised he didn’t get more comedic roles and was mostly a western star, considering how great he is here and in Sullivan’s Travels. The other person who shines is Mary Astor, who is excellent as a spoiled brat, even though she’s a little too unattractive for the role. The ending is so ridiculous that it actually makes sense. In conclusion, this film is perfect Sturges, with all the characteristics and traits that his movies contain. Romantic comedies are so terrible these days, they really should consider rewatching this film and learn a thing or two.
I was expecting this to be a horror movie, since I first heard of it in the book Nightmare USA and the book mostly features independently-produced horror films, but I was wrong. This movie has more in common with Roger Corman’s The Trip than with any other horror film out there. The way the film was shot does feature many hallucinatory effects, particularly the final freakout of the Simon character which is very reminiscent of 2001. Even the use of stock footage, with the floods, looks pretty realistic. The murders and stalk sequences are also very well done, even if they feature a hokey red-balloon effect, but this adds to the weirdness of the situation. What was interesting however, is that the film does portray witchcraft, and the Wiccan religion in particular, with a lot of seriousness and reality, with the exception of the obligatory nude ritual, which is a given in most low-budget exploitation films. Not only do we see a lot of the truthful lingo in the film, but also the rituals are very similar. We also realize that Simon is a devout believer who willingly decides to go against the teachings of his religion: in other words, he knows that he’s doing evil things, and he knows that everything he does will be visited by him two-fold. Even with this, he still decides to defy the laws of the Wiccan religion.
As far as the casting goes, Andrew Prine does a pretty good job. He is able to pull off the speeches and witchcraft mumbo jumbo with a straight face and believable manner, similar to the way Christopher Lee does in The Devil Rides Out. Still, he does sometimes look like Napoleon Dynamite’s brother, and his purple cape can make him hard to take seriously once in a while. The rest of the cast is pretty good, although nothing very memorable other than Prine. Still, this is a very original, psychedelic movie that deserves to have a wider audience, and comes highly recommended.
The story reads like a real legend, Damballa being, of course, one of the main Gods in Haitian voodoo. And it’s fairytale nature is represented in it’s locations. I haven’t seen many films that take place in the Louisiana bayou, but after seeing this I get reminded of just how beautiful the place really is. Jack Weis is able to photograph it a truly exquisite photographic eye, and by adding it a tons of fog machine magic, it makes it look like an even more haunting place. The ritual scenes, with Maureen Ridley dancing, often naked, in the shores of it’s beaches truly add to the hallucinatory nature of the film.
The movie does have it’s faults however. The acting is pretty much non-existent, and the audio is out of sync, like it was recorded in post-production. The most interesting character was definitely Damballa, played by Maureen Ridley, who is both beautiful and enchanting. Sadly this is her first and only acting credit, and seems to have been swallowed by the Louisiana bayou along with her character. Speaking of following works, director Jack Weis would go on to make the fun and exploitative Mardi Gras Massacre, which as much as I like it, has nothing on Crypt Of Dark Secrets. It’s a classy, bewitching, hallucinatory film that deserves to be discovered.
